 |
IN FOCUS: ARTICLE |
|
|
|
 |
|
|
Safe Sex — Online
by Cindy Kuzma, 09.04.07
Talking with strangers about sex can put you at risk for being an online victim. |
|
The Internet is a great place to connect with others and learn about your English paper topic, your favorite band, and yes, even sex. After all, that's what you're doing on teenwire.com!
On this site, you'll find sexuality and relationship info you can trust. But there are many places — and people — online that you just can't trust when it comes to sex.
You've heard the horror stories — a 13-year-old girl goes to meet the 41-year-old guy she's been instant messaging, and ends up getting kidnapped or sexually abused. You might think these stories are made up or couldn't happen to you. Not true, says Irene (not her real name), 16, who educates other young people about Internet dangers as part of a group called Teenangels. "People think they're immune to it," she says. "They believe they'll know when someone is an online predator. But you don't know, and that's what makes it so scary."
New Study Points Out Web Dangers
Researchers at the University of New Hampshire recently did a telephone survey of Internet users age 10 to 17. In the previous year, one-third of those surveyed had been exposed to online porn they didn't want to see, one in seven were asked to participate in sex-related behavior online or offline, and one in 11 were harassed.
The survey had some good news compared to five years ago, when one in five teens online were sexually solicited. The bad news is that the worst types of propositions — where an online "friend" wanted to meet offline — were just as common.
That doesn't mean you have to hide in a hole or, worse, give up MySpace or Facebook. But it does mean you should stay smart about online relationships. Start with the following tips.
Don't Fall for Online Tricks
So, you're having a tough month at home and at school. Luckily, you met this great girl on Facebook who understands what you're going through. Plus, she's older, rich, and wants to fly you to Los Angeles to be a rock star.
Sound too good to be true? It is, says Parry Aftab, a cyberspace lawyer and executive director of the online education organization WiredSafety. "You need to recognize that if there's a 40-year-old guy who tells you that he loves you and that you're the most wonderful and sophisticated creature he's ever met, he's just trying to get sex," she says.
Talking with strangers about sex can put you at risk for being an online victim. So trust your gut when dealing with people you don't know, warns Nancy McBride, National Safety Director of the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children. "If someone asks you a question and your first response is, 'Uh-oh,' listen to that!" she says.
Find an Offline Cyber-buddy
Your instincts can help, but that doesn't mean you should face the Web alone. Ask someone who's a friend IRL (in real life) to check out your online profile, recommends Irene. Sometimes it's easier for another person to tell when a photo or personal detail is just a little too juicy or gives away too much personal information about how someone might be able to find you — IRL.
If you meet a great new guy or girl online, run it by your friends. They may point out something weird about them you hadn't considered. And even if Xanga might as well be Mars to your mom, tell a parent or another trusted adult when you feel like you're in over your head — for instance, when you feel like you can't back out of a meeting with an online-only friend.
Know Who Your Real Friends Are
You might think the more friends you have on MySpace, the cooler you are. But why would you want people you don't even know to read about your real-life drama?
Irene has a policy for when she gets a request on MySpace or Facebook: "If I look at their picture, and I don't within two seconds know their first and last name, or if I see the name and I can't picture that person or figure out where I know him from, then I don't add him." This, plus setting her profile to "private," helps protect her and the people on her friends list from potential predators.
Think Before You Click
Whether it's a profile, blog, or forum, what happens online doesn't always stay online. You Google people all the time - assume your friends and teachers do too. "Make sure that whatever you post online, you'd feel real comfortable having not only your parents see but also everybody at your school," McBride says. Also, think about the future — those sexy pics you posted on MySpace could turn up when you're applying for college or a job, or running for Congress, and ruin your chances at both.
Have Fun, but Be Smart
"Enjoy what the Internet has to offer — it's got great stuff," McBride says. "But you have to be careful." Check out Wired Safety and NetSmartz to learn more about protecting yourself online. |
|
|
|
Printable Version
Email this page