 |
IN FOCUS: ARTICLE |
|
|
|
 |
|
|
Who's a Virgin?
by TAG and Ellen Friedrichs, 04.14.06
Different people define virginity in different ways. Most people agree that women and men lose their virginity the first time they have penile-vaginal intercourse. Many people also believe that two women or two men can lose their virginity through oral or anal intercourse.
The Teen Advisory Group (TAG) wanted to find out how different teens define virginity. It turned out that they didn't always agree on the definitions. Here's what they had to say.
Isis, age 17, says:
You lose your virginity when you break your hymen.
The TAG Team says:
This is false. Girls can do many things to break their hymens that don't have to do with sex, such as riding bikes, doing gymnastics, and using tampons. So a broken hymen isn't a sign that a girl has ever had sex.
Kelsea, age 16, says:
Virgins are people who never had vaginal or anal sex. You don't lose your virginity through having sex with someone of the same sex.
The TAG Team says:
We disagree! Just because same-sex couples might not be having vaginal intercourse, it doesn't mean they aren't having sex — and if you have sex, you aren't a virgin.
Elle, age 17, says:
You lose your virginity when you have sex with a guy you absolutely love! I had sex before, but I didn't lose my virginity until I was 100 percent in love.
The TAG Team says:
Love doesn't define virginity. Even if your first time is with someone you don't love, you are still having sex, and most people believe that if you had sex before, you aren't a virgin.
Janelle, age 18, says:
Virginity means to be untouched and inexperienced and pure at heart. Virginity is not only a physical thing.
The TAG Team says:
It's true that when you lose your virginity it isn't only a physical thing. It can definitely be an emotional experience. But it is also important to remember that having sex doesn't make your heart "unpure."
Natalie, age 16, says:
You lose your virginity through anal or vaginal sex but not through oral sex.
The TAG Team says:
Though everyone has different ideas about this, some people think that if you have oral sex you're not a virgin. Having oral sex for the first time might be different that having other types of sex, but it is still a form of sex.
Chris, age 18, says:
I don't think that touching each other or having oral sex mean losing your virginity. These days it only means actual sex.
The TAG Team says:
We think you're half right. Things like touching and masturbation aren't usually considered having "sex." But for a lot of people, oral sex — just like vaginal or anal sex — is "sex."
No matter how teens define virginity, it's important to remember that having sex — or any kind of sex play — is a big decision that deserves a lot of thought. For more on this topic, check out Am I Ready?
* * *
What would you like to hear TAG talk about? Send us a Talk Back comment with the subject line "TAG." |
|
|
|
Printable Version
Email this page