We all know what it means to be healthy. You eat right. You exercise. You take care of your body. Simple, right? But what about being healthy when it comes to sex?
There’s no question that using birth control and practicing safer sex will help you reduce your risk of pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections. But sexual health doesn’t stop there. In fact, sexual health is something that encompasses all parts of your life. It affects your heart, your mind, and your body, and it’s a key part of how you interact with the world each day.
Getting to Know Yourself
The first step toward healthy sexuality is getting to know your body. While you might feel shy at first about exploring “down there,” it’s vital for young people to become familiar with their sexual anatomy — what it looks like, how it works, and what feels good. People who are familiar with their sex organs are more likely to detect a possible infection or other issue. For example, a guy may see a bump on his penis that wasn’t there before, or a girl might notice that her discharge looks different lately.
By checking out their bodies, people can also reduce the shame and mystery they may have about their sex organs, which is a great way to boost sexual self-esteem.
Masturbation can be a key to sexual health. Masturbation is touching one’s own sex organs for pleasure. There’s no right or wrong way to masturbate — it’s about discovering what kinds of touching and sensations work for you. It is a way to learn to have orgasms. Learning what does or doesn’t feel good during masturbation can help people communicate with their partners about what they want during sex play.
As people learn what kinds of fantasies turn them on — and what turns them off — during masturbation they might begin to learn a bit about their sexual orientation, too. Sexual orientation — being lesbian, gay, bisexual, or straight — is about sexual attraction. Your sexual orientation is a vital part of your sexual health. But remember, it can take years to understand our sexual orientation, so if you’re not sure where you “fit,” that’s very common and completely normal.
Let’s Talk About It!
While there’s a lot you can do on your own to develop healthy sexuality, sex play often happens with someone else. Being sexual with another person — whether that means kissing, touching, or intercourse — involves a lot of responsibility. This means there’s no such thing as “it just happened” (unless someone is forced into sex play without her or his consent).
“It just happened” means you’re not making conscious choices. For a sexually healthy person, every sex act is a choice. Part of making that choice is being prepared to practice safer sex — deciding which sexual activities you want to engage in and which you don’t and how to reduce your risks while doing them. And then, of course, it’s important to communicate those choices to your partner.
Remember, communication is one of the most vital tools for sexual health. Saying no is about setting boundaries. Everyone has the right to set boundaries and to have those boundaries respected. Some people communicate their boundaries and sexual preferences with body language. But body language is not always clear. So, it can be really important to talk about what you do want to do, what you don’t want to do, and what you like.
Another aspect of communication is emotional expression. Feelings and emotions are a huge part of sex play. Sharing your emotions — whether that’s fear, excitement, love, or anxiety — helps sex partners connect and understand one another.
Sexual Health 101
Sexual health is a constant learning process. Of course, Web sites like teenwire.com® are a great place to learn about the things that affect your sexual health — like birth control, infections, and safer sex. But there are lots of other great sources of sex information out there. Parents can often give great advice. So can teachers and other trusted adults. Do you have friends that you are very comfortable with and that you trust? If so, you may find that sharing your feelings with them about sex and relationships is a good way to learn, and to feel comfortable about the fact that you — like everyone else! — are a sexual being.
Of course, it’s important to remember that there are plenty of myths and misinformation out there about sex, so be sure to check any questionable information against a reliable source before you take it to heart.
It’s Your Right!
While sex may be a private thing, sexual health affects us all. That’s why it’s important to speak out for your sexual rights. Teens have the right to
- learn about their bodies
- decide whether or not they want to be sexual — alone or with another person
- say no to unwanted sexual activities and say yes to desired sexual activities
- learn about their sexual health — including information about birth control, sexually transmitted infections, safer sex, and sexual pleasure
- express their sexuality without fear of pregnancy, infections, prejudice, or violence
You have power over your body and your sexuality, but with that power comes responsibility. So use what you’ve learned wisely, and work towards becoming a sexually healthy person!
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