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IN FOCUS: ARTICLE |
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Not Your Parents' Prom
by Allison Bloom, 05.30.03

"Even though most of the students knew I was gay, it seemed like they were all in shock." |
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Girls in slinky dresses paired off with guys in black tuxes, all hoping to be named reigning couple of their high school prom. It's every teen's dream come true. Or is it?
For some, prom is the pinnacle of their high school experience a chance to show off new threads or flaunt the cutie you snagged for the occasion. But for many lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) teens, the focus on guy-girl couples and traditional gender roles (and appearance) is stressful and annoying.
Free to Be?
"When you identify yourself as LGBT and you're at a function that focuses on young heterosexual coupling, it feels as though you're being excluded," says Brigitte, 19. "It's almost like an indirect message that you are unwelcome if you don't fit the part."
Some teens have had to fight in court to attend their high school prom with a same-sex date, even though the law clearly defends their right to do so. Peer intimidation and harassment also work to discourage LGBT teens from taking part in this school tradition.
But now there's an alternative way to celebrate. Proms for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) teens have been popping up all over the country. They're designed to let teens of any sexual orientation express themselves openly while giving them a chance to attend a rocking, community-sponsored event.
Ryan, 17, attended the junior prom at his high school with a same-sex date. "At first, all eyes were on us. Even though most of the students knew I was gay, it seemed like they were all in shock," he recalls. "LGBT proms, on the other hand, make you feel comfortable and welcome."
Express Yourself
Hailed as America's first suburban gay prom, the center for Long Island Gay and Lesbian Youth (LIGALY) has hosted an annual Pride Gala for three years. The event attracts teens from all over the country and is consistently sold out. LIGALY's Pride Gala and others like it are proof that these kinds of events fill an important need in the LGBT community.
"More and more, LGBT students are feeling comfortable attending their high school prom with a same-sex date, but many teens still skip their proms because they don't feel welcome or safe," says Gail Rolf, an advisor for the Los Angeles-based Friends of Project 10, a nonprofit organization that raises money privately to fund events and programs that serve mostly LGBT teens. "Our LGBT Youth Prom is open to everyone. We don't check sexual orientation at the door."
Time for a Change
Although attitudes toward LGBT youth are changing, most LGBT teens feel they aren't changing fast enough. In the meantime, LGBT proms can provide a safe space for young people to celebrate and be open about their sexuality without the fear of harassment and discrimination.
"In a society that labels you as subculture, it's nice to know that there's a place you can go to let go of your insecurities," says Brigitte. "Still, I would like to see LGBT youth be treated with acceptance at general school dances and functions, and I'm certain that day will eventually come." |
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