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Blasting Myths About Lesbians
by Christy Brownlee, 11.13.02
A lesbian is a woman who is sexually attracted to other women. A few lesbians and teenwire.com are here to dispel some common misunderstandings about lesbians.
Myth #1: Contrary to myth, lesbians do get periods, and they can get pregnant — if they have sex with men.
Raina, a 17-year-old lesbian from California who came out two years ago, can give us the facts. Her monthly cycle is as regular as clockwork. She got her period when she was 12, and she's been menstruating ever since. "I'm just like all the other girls, blood, tampons, and all!" she said.
And why wouldn't she get her period? Your sexual orientation — being straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, or questioning — has nothing to do with your anatomy. Lesbians have the same reproductive organs as straight women: they have vaginas, vulvas, ovaries, and a uterus with a lining that builds up with blood and tissue in response to a hormonal cycle. While some women wish they didn't have periods, you can't lose old "Aunt Flo" that easily.
So, because lesbians have the same body parts as other girls, they're equally able to get pregnant once they start menstruating. That means that, like any other woman, a lesbian who chooses to have intercourse or sex play with a guy should use birth control if she doesn't want to get pregnant.
Myth #2: Contrary to myth, lesbians can get sexually transmitted infections and do need to get gynecological exams, even if they're sexually active only with women.
Chas, a 15-year-old lesbian from New York, hasn't had sex with anyone yet. But she plans to make her first visit to the gynecologist as soon as she becomes sexually active. "I know that lesbians can still get the same infections straight girls do, so I want to keep myself healthy," she said.
Just like straight women, lesbians need to have a checkup with a clinician once they become sexually active.
And while transmission rates are indeed lower for women who have sex with women, it's still possible for lesbians to acquire and transmit infections through mutual masturbation, oral sex, or sharing sex toys. Lesbians can reduce the risk of infection the same way straight people can — through safer sex, including low risk behaviors and the use of latex barriers — like using gloves, Glyde dams for oral sex, and condoms on sex toys.
Women who use sex toys should follow the manufacturer's directions for keeping them clean.
Myth #3: Contrary to myth, not all lesbians are virgins, and the the sex they have is real.
Tabitha, a 16-year-old lesbian from Washington, says, "I don't think women have to be virgins to be lesbians."
People have different definitions of virginity, and for same-sex partners, definitions of virginity can be very diverse. Some people believe that a virgin is someone who has never had penile-vaginal intercourse. Others believe that a woman is a virgin if she has an intact hymen — the thin skin that stretches across the opening of the vagina. Lesbians may believe they have given up their virginity if they've had sex with other women, or if they've had oral, anal, or manual — not vaginal — sex with men. Some also believe that no matter what kind of sex they may have had with men, it is their first sex with another women that ends their virginity.
For the record, sex doesn't have to include penile-vaginal intercourse to be "real." Real sex for lesbians, gays, bisexuals, or straight folks can include mutual masturbation, rubbing or "dry humping," penetration with sex toys, or oral sex. With all these possibilities, many women who only have sex with other women don't consider themselves to be virgins.
Some lesbians have had penile-vaginal intercourse before they come out, and some lesbians occasionally have sex with men after they come out. That doesn't make them any "less lesbian" than women who've never had sex with men — we get to choose the labels that makes us feel most comfortable, or we can reject them all if we want to. |
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