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Am I Gay If I Dream About Girls?
by Joyce, 12.01.98
Dreams are funny things. You wake up from a really freaky dream shuddering over images of making out with your math teacher or terrified that you're still trapped in the horrible corridors of Tomb Raider world. You reassure yourself that dreams don't really mean anything and drift off back to sleep.
But somehow that logic breaks down when you have a sweaty sex dream about your best girlfriend. You lay there, flushed and freaked, terrified that your same-sex dreams are trying to tell you something. And you might be right — some people say that you dream about what you know, what you fear, and what you desire. And sometimes what you fear is what you desire. True enough, you might be gay. We'll get to that in a minute.
But the source of dreams — your subconscious — isn't as easy to read as a trashy romance novel. For instance, a common dream is the kind where you go to school totally naked. Does that mean you want to sit through class in the buff? Nah. You're just feeling anxious and unprepared for something.
Likewise, steamy same-sex dreams are incredibly common. Most everyone has a sexual dream sooner or later about someone of their gender — does that mean that most everyone is gay or bisexual? Nope. It could mean a lot of different things.
The dream may be telling you that you just want to be emotionally closer to her, or may be expressing feelings of competition, or jealousy or — hey, we don't know your mind, you'll have to figure it out for yourself!
On the other hand, if you start having these dreams a lot, or with lots of different girls, or over a long period of time, you might be onto something. One key is to notice what you think about when you're awake — if girls start popping up in your daydreams and fantasies, it may say something about your sexual orientation.
The truth is this: If you're lesbian, gay, straight, or bisexual that's what you are, and it's a fine thing. Don't sweat it, accept it, because no amount of denial is going to change what makes you hot.
If you're a lesbian, you can choose not to get physical with girls for a while, but that's not going to make you straight. And eventually you'll want to make something satisfying happen.
In the meantime, repressing your same-sex desires could easily make them turn up in your dreams. (When your brain's defenses are down, it's easier to imagine what you'd really like to do at those slumber parties!)
So if you ask us if dreaming about other girls means you're gay we're going to give you these answers: Maybe. No. Yes. Maybe not. We really can't tell — only you know where you're coming from. Your dreams may just nudge you into thinking about it sometimes, that's all. |
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