Your Question:
Dear Experts,
My boyfriend and I have only been together for almost a month and a half. A lot of the time he wants to be kissing or something more. He wanted to do more than kissing and at first i refused but then i finally gave in and we have done everything besides sex. I feel ashamed, i told myself i wasnt going to do those things, why did i give in? How can i talk about this with him and get him to just hang out sometimes?
waffle, 09.09.03
The Answer:
Dear waffle,
No one should ever do something sexual that she or he is not comfortable with, and no one should ever pressure a partner to do things sexually. One of the most important things you can do is let your boyfriend know how you feel.
Be clear with him and explain how you feel about sex play — let him know what you are ready to do and what you're not ready to do. Be honest and firm. You can say "I've made up my mind to wait" or "I really care about you, but I'm not ready to do this." These things may be hard to say, and you can tell him that. It is very important for him respect the boundaries that you've set.
Sex play is not the only way people let each other know they care. People demonstrate love by being there for each other, solving problems together, sharing hard times as well as good times, helping each other grow, and being patient with each other.
Hope this information helps!
Take care,
teenwire.com® Editors
This column is for informational purposes only and is not intended to constitute medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have a medical problem, please call toll-free 1-800-230-PLAN for an appointment with the Planned Parenthood health center nearest you.
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