Dear SSCG,

There are many different beliefs about what virginity loss is. Most people agree that women and men lose their virginity the first time they have penile-vaginal intercourse. Many people also believe that people who have sex with the same sex can lose virginity through oral or anal intercourse. Some also believe that people have to give consent to lose their virginity — that virgins who are raped, for example, do not lose their virginity. Nearly all people in the U.S. agree, however, that people who masturbate or have other kinds of sex play — including fingering, or touching a sex partner's genitals with the hands — are still virgins.

There are still some people who think about virginity in a very old-fashioned kind of way. They believe that an intact hymen — the thin tissue that stretches across at least part of the opening of the vagina in most girls at birth — is the only proof of a woman's virginity. Most people do not believe this. They know that each girl is born with a hymen, but that hymens come in a variety of shapes and sizes — and some girls may appear to have no hymen at all. Many people also know that it is possible for a woman's hymen to become stretched open through insertive masturbation as well as during sports, and other non-sexual activities. So, they do not believe the condition of the hymen is an accurate definition of virginity.

Hope this information helps!

Take care,

teenwire.com^® Editors

This column is for informational purposes only and is not intended to constitute medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have a medical problem, please call toll-free 1-800-230-PLAN for an appointment with the Planned Parenthood health center nearest you.