Dear matthatter,

There's no need to feel stupid — this is one of our most popular questions! There is no official answer that defines what the bases represent. But many people, especially young people, use metaphors taken from baseball as "code" meaning different types of sex play.

In general, people refer to French kissing — open-mouth kissing — as first base. Second base is usually touching a woman's breasts. Third base is using the hand to stimulate the genitals. And hitting a homerun generally refers to having vaginal intercourse.

The problem with these very old-fashioned metaphors for sex play is that they imply that there is a competition going on between sex partners. Today, we are more aware that sex partners are equals, and that competing against one another to get what they want sexually doesn't make for healthy relationships. We know that sex should be about communication, not about competition.

Hope this information helps!

Take care,

teenwire.com^® Editors

This column is for informational purposes only and is not intended to constitute medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have a medical problem, please call toll-free 1-800-230-PLAN for an appointment with the Planned Parenthood health center nearest you.